The day of the tattoos

It was the 13th February 2013; Richard's birthday and 14 years since he was last with us. We had decided that we were all going to have tattoos that incorporated our family symbol in some way . 8x was always special to Richard and I, and became a family code of acknowledging how much love we felt for each other and our little clan. The 8 and x lent itself beautifully to another symbol that I loved - the infinity sign, so that was what I had done on the back of my neck. 

We went off to the tattoo place, which was at a home in Edenvale that had been recommended to us by Caroline - a precious family friend. I was pleased to see how clean and professional the whole setup was the and was most grateful that I went first. I think I would have chickened out if I didn't. We discussed the position of the tattoo, the size of it and the colour that I wanted incorporated into the symbol. Off I went and had no idea what to expect. 

My prior experience with tattoos was only watching Tarryn and Luke getting theirs done in Thailand in 2010. I'm surprised I ever agreed to have it done after watching Luke's performance! It was a bit painful, but I got through it fine and was very pleased with the result, even though I have never been able too see it, excepting for photos and using mirrors. I often forget that I have a tattoo.

Kiara got a beautiful feather outlined in white ink with 2 beads hanging off it that had the 8 and x in them. Devin got his dad's name and the infinity sign underneath it and Tarryn had 8x on the inside of her middle finger. She also had the go-ordinates of our house above her hip and a beautiful saying that is special to her and her cousin Anthea on her foot.

I loved this ceremony of honoring Richard and having a visual display of our shared family bond.

Our heritage

This months interest of mine is our heritage. I found an app to do a family tree, and so far I have added 105 of our closest relatives. I'm hooked but am hampered by the fact that I don't want to pay money to trace ancestors at this stage. I'm not sure which sites I can trust, so need to do more digging on my own. The most interesting site I have found so far is one that has a project to photograph and document grave sites. I found photos of my dad's grave, all 4 of my grandparents and my great grandfather too. Although the cemetery is not too far from where I live, it's not safe to visit it, I really appreciate their efforts. I remember as a little girl, we would go the the flower shop over the road from the Primrose cemetery in Germiston, every Sunday morning. The shop had wide red polished steps, I think they were curved leading up to the display of tin buckets that held all the flowers. I can still recall the smell in that shop with its red polished floor. I learnt what Glads were (gladioli) and carnations and baby's breath. We would all go as a family with my Oumie (Gran) and my parents, brother, Dolores my aunt, sometimes my uncle George too. Once, my uncle George was screamed at by a person visiting because he sat on the gravestone 😀. He was never too fussed about protocol. There were always 2 old ladies visiting the grave near to my Dida's grave, they would be there in an old VW beetle car. I think they brought their lunch with them. They wore black from top to toe, even covering their heads, maybe that's the reason I still wear black to work every day. From the day I went back after Richrds death, I have never worn any colour to work. I think the word is a mantilla for the head coverings they wore; strange how you remember stuff so clearly from your youth. My Oumie died in 1971 so these memories were from before that.

One of my new 101 goals

So I love having goals, but even more than that I love accomplishing them them. I will be posting regularly again in this space. It's only for a select few, so it's not like any of the other social media that I use.  My new list will be published soon but, I want to tell you about this one goal so long, and an app that I found. The app is called Memrise and it's helping me to learn more of another language. I have tried listening to cd's for languages, as well as other apps but nothing comes close to this one. It's simple to use, clean design and visible progress makes it perfect for me. 

This time I chose Spanish to test out and after 2 days, I'm confident that I can read, say and write the 21 new words that I have learnt and reviewed a few times. I was caught out the first time I used the app, I listened to the words and recognized them but one option they request is, they say the word and you have to type it out! After that I focused on how to spell the words too.

This is what the icon looks like. I downloaded it from the iStore as a free app.

More later xx

The keys to my heart

11 years ago I made a scrapping page about my three kids.

I wrote each of them a note and chose a font that I thought suited their personalities. I recently paged through the albums and read what I had written. I can't believe how accurate and appropriate the notes are 10 years on. At the time of writing, Tarryn was 14 Kiara was 9 and Devin was 6 years old. Take a read and see what you think.

Tarryn

For you I chose "girly curls" as a font, not only because I know it's your favourite but it also sums up the way I see you. You are my girly girl. My mirror image. As you grow and go through stages, I am reminded of myself at various ages. My advice to you would be to appreciate who and what you are.  Focus on all your positive attributes. The only negative ones are created in your own imagination. Use your talents of responsibility, patience, your ability to be practical and listen. Believe in yourself and know that you can do anything you set out to do. I love you, mom.

Kiara

I chose a "butterfly" font for you because that is what you remind me of. A free spirt flying around and seeing the beauty most of us just don't get. You are my passionate, intense and spirited darling. You have been blessed with so many talents, the obvious arty ones that you are already perusing.  Don't forget to nurture your other talents like your ability to be sensitive to how other people are feeling.  My advice to you would be to have more fun and don't stress yourself out too much. Concentrate on what makes you happy. I love you, mom.

Devin

The font I have chosen for you is called "golf" because you epitomize the qualities that the game stands for, honesty, integrity, sportsmanship and a whole lot of fun. You have such a wonderful caring and balanced personality. I love your teasing nature that comes straight from your dad. My advice to you would be to live your life with the certainty that you have an excellent character, don't deviate what what you know is good and pure and right. I love you, mom.

Devin's 18th

I have to reflect on Devins 18th birthday that just passed. It really feels like just a while ago that Richard, Peter Richmond and I were sitting on the same patio I still have, chatting about life and the plans for Devin's delivery the next day. We didn't know he was a boy at that stage. His birth was delayed from early morning to late afternoon because of an emergency and so I had the epidural and Richard was with me for his birth. He was so excited and kept saying Tasha "you won't  believe what it is" and then eventually said "it's a boy" he was absolutely delighted. The girls at home cried when they heard the news, they wanted a girl!

I spent that Christmas in the Sandton clinic with Devin and we had a full Christmas lunch together. All the rest of the family came to visit and they spent Christmas in Randburg with Darrel and Marina

So many things have happened since then, good and bad but our family unit has survived. I think the best and most recent example of the resilience that my kids have, is for Devin's birthday he wanted to go to the strip club Teasers with some friends, and I managed to arrange a driving service to take them to Rivonia and to fetch them. He called me later and said that Teasers was unexpectedly closed but he was negotiating with the driver and would make alternate arrangements. I think that has been the best quality that we all share. Things happen and life doesn't go as planned but we are able to make a plan and keep smiling.

A lot of people would have felt hard done by and moaned about their misfortune, not Devin.

Bedtime stories

I was tidying my study today and saw these Enid Blyton books. I collected most of a series of 100 Enid Blyton books and began reading them to Tarryn when she was little. My family grew to 3 so I got lots of opportunities to read the stories to my kids. We never got through all the books, mostly because I had to re-read the favourites. The Faraway Tree was the all time winner, followed by Mr Pink Whistle and Amelia Jane. Such amazing memories of special times with my kids. I wrote the dates in pencil in a lot of the books and who I read the stories to. Thinking about them always took me back to my childhood, reminiscing about reading the yellow, black and blue Enid Blyton books that belonged to my aunt Dolores. I found one at a bookshop once and bought it just for the memories. Kiara made me read Naughty Amelia Jane to her the other night and she's 20 years old. I hope that's one thing they treasure with their own kids one day, there is nothing as nice and all cuddling up on the bed with a great book.

I ♥️ Cape Town

This past weekend, Scott and I flew down to Cape Town to see grandad and the rest of the family. We managed to pack such a lot into our 3 days, I got fantastic photos, loved seeing the family and swam in 2 oceans again. The sea just does something to me, I fall in love with it every time.

Clifton was perfect but the water was freezing